Beat Procrastination: Do. Laugh. Try (Again).

If the hardest thing to do is to start, for others, the second hardest probably is to laugh while doing, and third to try again when things go wrong. And usually, they are in that order. Procrastination is just one of those habits that hinder our progress and ability to accomplish things on time or when they are required. There are these 3 words that actually made me change how I view the tasks that are given to me – do, laugh, try (again). Hopefully, this could help others deal with their putting off habits too.
The foremost challenge we face when doing a project believe it or not is to figure out how to start it. Some people (like me) are so analytical that they tend to over-analyze information before getting their hands to work. Also, some tend to become overly creative when overwhelmed with the project at hand. The key is to just start not by thinking but by actually doing. Let me give an example: if you want to write an article, instead of merely thinking about the article, you can actually turn your computer on and start typing whatever thoughts come into your mind. Another thing is if you would like to start a scrapbook, simply grab a scrapbook and colored papers (if that’s your material) and start cutting and pasting until you’re done. If you want a new choreography for your dance troupe, start playing the music and face the mirror and start figuring out the steps. If you want to run or go to the gym, you just have to do wear your rubber shoes, and do walk outside and drag your legs to running. If it’s working out, then you just have to do get into the gym and do start lifting weights. They key is to move, to engage your physique to the completion of your project; to simply do. This reinforces habit #1 – Be proactive.
The second challenge is being able to laugh at ourselves when the initial outcome of our project is not what we have hoped for. Some people get easily disappointed with their projects because it’s not what they envisioned so they tend to put it off again until they think they’re ready or more equipped. The fact is, if we are to put off our tasks say 2 days or so, we don’t get more ready or more equipped enough to fulfill it. It is an illusion too to wait for perfect conditions to arise before we accomplish things, because our surroundings and conditions will never be perfect – perfection does not exist, at least not in this lifetime. So let’s laugh at the flaws of our work and let’s work with joy; then, let’s try again.

The 4 Agreements in Classroom and Life (Last Part)

Life Rehearsal inside the School

Yes, the school in itself is a separate culture from than of outside its walls and the school administration, staff, and faculty members are all but a part of the building of this culture.  When a student enters the school, it is the responsibility of the aforementioned group of people to make sure that the culture a student will live in is a culture that will enable him to grow as a person and not a culture that will rob him off of his self-esteem and self-worth.  And yes it takes that long of a rehearsal to ensure that a student is deeply imbibed with a culture of values and principles so that he can face even more challenging tasks ahead of his life when he’s no longer inside the school wall.

The first 18 years of life are the most delicate years in one’s development.  Freudian and even Eriksonian psychology have both proven how issues in these first few stages are carried on to adulthood and how adults struggle to put things together in perspective in connection with their childhood and adolescence conflicts.  Naturally it follows that aside from the family home, the school culture is the next of kin that molds students.  As students grow older, they spend more hours at school, probably even more hours than they spend being with their family.  A high school student approximately spends an average of 10 hours to 12 hours a day with school people and 8 hours sleeping.  That would leave them 4 to 6 hours as time for themselves and talking to other member of the families.  If you do the math, you’d figure how their social life is centered on the school system.  This system is what schools have to work on to protect so that an average of 10 to 12 hours a student spends in its walls shall count on his young life.

It is an amazing realization on my part that four simple agreements can make a difference in a child’s life if these agreements are lived by to heart in the school.  It is yet one of the most brilliant and straightforward ideas those teachers can reinforce from time to time in the classroom and in the school as a whole.  It is with fervent hope that when we release the students to join the world out there, that they may choose their thoughts carefully and speak only about the best of people, and situations no matter how hard it may be; that they choose integrity, word of honor, and positive language in their communication; that they choose to smile at others and be compassionate to those who may look at them as enemies instead of violently fighting back – this is because their self worth is not something others can steal because they understand that they shouldn’t take things personally; that they are clear with their communication and they are responsible at any given time because they don’t assume; that in every minute of the day they choose to live their best self because that’s what these agreements are all about; that as educators and builders of school culture we let students become this because, as well, we are impeccable with our words, we don’t take things personally, we don’t make assumptions, and we always do our best.   Yes, 4 simple agreements to keep rehearsing our students to be the best people they can be everyday.  Everyday, the curtain opens.  As teachers, we get to teach.  As students, they get to perform.  Curtain calls.

The 4 Agreements in Classroom and Life (Part 4 of 5)

(Agreements #3 and #4)

Agreement #3 – do not make assumptions, is also one of the contracts a teacher must sign up to. It tells the teacher to be dynamic and as such must be able to clearly communicate ideas and even classroom rules. On the first part of this writing, it was mentioned how conflicts arise from “I-thought” phrases and end up with it. One of the common mistakes of the teachers is to assume that students “must know” or “must already know” attitude. To add to it, some teachers also assume their students to be clairvoyants who can read their minds. ☺ The question that teachers must answer in relation to this agreement is, “Did you do everything in your power to effectively and clearly communicate what you want to say? Were you impeccable with your word?” Once again, we are reinforcing here the first agreement by clearly and effectively communicating to our students what it is that we want them to achieve. Rubrics and exemplars are just some of the means we can communicate to our students our objectives for their activities. One-word criteria are not enough. Each criterion should be explained and given a respective point system. Teachers can’t expect student to do what is not taught or communicated to them. Teachers can only expect students to perform better based on the guidelines that are given. This agreement is also valuable in setting up classroom rules. Teachers don’t assume that the students already know how to listen because some students really need guidance to be directed to even a simple action. Yes, they need to be directed even to a simple action such as listening. Making students listen is probably the most challenging task a teacher faces; listen to instructions, lectures, classmates reciting, name it, a teacher often faces a big challenge making students listen. At school we are taught about the different SR (Stimulus-Response) theories. They will serve as a valuable practice in the classroom as well. It is enlightening to see how some teachers efficiently manage classroom behavior merely by clapping. Some others bring some handy musical instruments with them to reinforce a certain behavior. My practice when I teach is to simply keep quiet and stand firm in front until the class noise dissipates. The important thing to remember is to enable the class associate a certain behavior with a certain stimulus. It is also important to remember that consistency is necessary for this practice. There are a lot of cues that a teacher can use to illicit a certain behavior. Those mentioned are auditory cues. Others can be visual cues. Pictures showing different images that students can associate with a certain behavior may also work. Others show a placard with a thinking hat on it to communicate to everybody that the activity involves some serious thinking. Others use a picture of an ear if they are to do a story telling class. Kinesthetic cues are also useful such as making the students raise their hands up together to signal a transition to the next work. All these practices mentioned are just some of the practical ways in which a teacher goes out of the way to be more creative to avoid making assumptions. They involve students in formulating ground rules and everybody understands what is expected of them. The gray areas are minimized and everything in agreement is in either black or white. This makes for the easy management and smooth flow of classroom activities.
The next agreement – always do your best, also provides for a perspective not necessarily of achievement but of self-worth and self-fulfillment. This fourth agreement encompasses all the other agreements and that to fulfill each of them, we have to do our best – correction – always do our best. The same agreement that we communicate to our students to ensure that they like their work and they are able to work in a culture not just of respect of others but respect for one’s self. That each work be done not simply with the aim of finishing it for grade but to make sure it is valuable and it can make a difference. Teachers walk the school everyday carrying these agreements that I now call weapons or instruments to guide not just their thoughts and actions but those of the students and other members of the school community as well. These 4 agreements can take part to promote a positive school culture that students can live by and bring with them when they step out of its walls. (To be continued.)

The 4 Agreements in Classroom and Life (Part 3 of 5)

(Agreement #2)

The primary underlying principle in agreement #1 is paradigm shift and it is a necessary prerequisite to agreement #2 – do not take things personally.  Earlier, I’ve cited examples that show how the ideal of a new teacher can be easily clouded by the new culture it becomes a part of.  We all know how easy it is to be swayed by those who surround us because all of us want to belong.  For sure, nobody wants to be left alone in one corner with his or her ideals.  Not all of us are that strong.  Sooner or later, once we have become a part of a culture, we eventually adjust and adapt to it.  So if you become a part of a competitive culture, chances are you’ll carry the same competitiveness when you enter another culture and it will take time before you dismantle your previous learning.  On the other hand, if you become a part of a cooperative culture, chances are you’ll carry the same cooperativeness when you walk out of it.  Sad to say, if you enter a culture that is pessimistic, even if you come from a culture of support and respect, you are still faced with a lot of challenges.  Again, not all of us last long even if we, teachers are taught with ideals.  The big question in this agreement is this – how much more our young students?  If we are adults and yet still be challenged by the real world in choosing between what’s right and what’s wrong, how much more are these young minds?  When I was growing up as a student, I had heard teachers say, “Di na kayo nahiya sa akin!  Teacher ninyo ako!” (Don’t you feel a bit ashamed!  I’m your teacher!) or “Hindi niyo ba ako mahal?  Adviser niyo pa man din ako…” (Don’t you love me?  It’s the least I expect for being your adviser).   Some of my teachers would go on with their never ending litany to the point that the only take-away we could go home that day was not even close to values education.  Fortunately for my teachers, it worked for me but not for my classmates.  I bought into their guilt-inducing strategies but not the others.  Now here’s the thing, since my teacher took it personally, I learned to take my classmates’ behavior personally too.  I thought they didn’t like my teacher and they were naturally disrespectful.  I saw them on the lens my teacher saw them from.  It wasn’t until I was already in college that I fully understood that we are just high school.  It was part of our development.  We were simply being high school.  Now, as I recall these high school moments in connection to these agreements, all I could think of was this: it wasn’t because my classmates were naturally rambunctious.  It was just that my teacher didn’t know how to be professional about it and my classmates unintentionally saw it.  She wasn’t able to command respect from them on a professional level.  In the classroom, most especially with high school students, the teacher can’t take things said personally even if they are personal.  A skilled and competent teacher must know how to deal with these kinds of circumstances because he or she should have been trained and prepared for this kind of situation.  Do not take things personally because in the classroom, you are a professional no matter what the case maybe.  The essence of your job depends on your professional skills as a teacher.  Students may open up with you on a personal level by telling you about their problems at home and other personal matters but even so, as a professional, you are expected to encounter this kind of situation.  Not to be misguided however, we are not suggesting that a teacher should be impersonal and distant.  Warmth and caring are just two of the most important traits a teacher should have.  But above all this, a teacher must understand that he or she is first and foremost a professional.  As teacher Joy puts it, “You should have no personal opinions, only professional ones.”  When you personally react to a perceived personal comment of a student, it makes you less professional.  In one workshop that I conducted, a male high school student called me with a bad word.  My first instinct would have been to react and get right back at him with his own lingo to give him a taste of his own medicine.  Yes, I felt that my ego was bruised.  Thankfully though, I instinctively reacted differently.  I said to myself that students like him are the very reasons why there should be professional teachers.  I simply inhaled and exhaled and said, “Is that what you think?” He said, “Yes!  Because you’re singling me out!  I wasn’t stomping my feet!” (The whole class, however, knew it was he.)  I quickly replied, “If that’s what you think, you’re entitled to it.  Meanwhile, sit down and join your classmates when you’ve mellowed down.”  I said those words with conviction and composure with my chin up and head high.  I never gave him another chance to speak and I ignored his mumblings on the side.  The class went on to its class activity and everything was back to normal and he felt awkward because he was the only one sitting down. (This student and I are now in good terms.  He apologized to me and I to him and we separated ways on a healthy note.)  In one instance, when teacher Joy threw the same scenario to a teacher in MI, the teacher simply said, “I understand you’re angry but we don’t allow that kind of word here in MI.  Sit down and I’ll talk to you after class.” – simple, straightforward, no drama, that’s how a trained professional teacher should deal with it and not by a long list of litany and guilt-inducing strategies that are often disgusting and unproductive.   (To be continued.)

The 4 Agreements in Classroom and Life (Part 2 of 5)

Classroom and School Culture

As a stage actor, I’m accustomed to rehearsing my lines, my actions, and my manners with my co-actors, and even my trail of thoughts before each performance.  And here’s the fact – actors who don’t rehearse and cram with their tasks always show less authenticity on stage and audience can usually tell.  Consistent rehearsal is necessary for an actor so that when he steps onstage, the portrayal of the character would seem effortless, natural.  He doesn’t have to make the audience believe.  They just do because he has become.  On a different standpoint, classrooms are pretty much the stage with the students as actors and teachers as their director.  However, this time as teachers, we don’t give them other characters to study because they have their own to explore.  This rehearsal is the students’ preparation for when they go out of the school walls.   The teacher is the moving factor that motivates a student to learn inside the classroom and outside it.  The challenge becomes tougher when a student is let out of the classroom and mingles with other students with other teachers.  That’s why it is also imperative that the school culture is integrated to reinforce the students’ learning.  In addition, a school in itself can live out a culture separate from that of outside its walls.  The faculty and staff also carry out and observe this culture so that when new students are taken in, their old unconstructive habits don’t prevail over the culture.  The culture starts to shape them, encourage them, affirm them until eventually their spirits are revived.  Then again and unfortunately, not all schools live out this culture of support.  I’ve seen students who change to their own disadvantage and I can’t blame them.  They come from schools whose culture didn’t allow them to grow.  These students come from schools that branded them; put labels on them as either intelligent or dumb, high IQ or low IQ, all based merely on their capability of the three R’s (reading, ‘riting, ‘rithmetic).  I’ve heard teachers blurt out to their students, “You are so lazy!”  When I was in 3^rd grade and I asked my language teacher a question, she just said, “Weren’t you listening?  I’ve just told you!”  Another science teacher I’ve heard said to her students, “Ano ba kayo?  Kanina pa ako paulit-ulit dito!  Para kayong mga tanga sa tanong ninyo!” (“What’s the matter with you people?  I’m starting to sound like a broken record here!  You’re starting to sound like a bunch of idiots with your questions!”).   All these scenarios are just some of the few and I can assure you that there are more.  Another reality is this – it’s hard to blame these schools.  These practices were passed onto them by their previous generation.  Not to mention that the teachers probably experienced the same thing when they were growing up.  In effect, they didn’t have people if not they lacked people that they can model proper practices from. 

I’m sharing this not to get back at the schools I know or the teachers that taught me or have worked with.  I’m sharing this because as an educator, the best way I know how to reach those fellow teachers is thru this writing.  I’d love to sit with my fellow educators and talk about this but I’m afraid that won’t happen anytime soon.  This writing however can be done in an hour or so and I could just easily tag them with the power of technology with the hope that the agreements presented here could bring them insights and practices that they can apply to their classrooms.  In education school, we were taught these principles repeatedly.  The big question is if we know them, then why are most of us not applying them?  The answer is surprisingly simple – the school culture; when most of us are thrown fresh from our respective colleges to the schools, our ideals are somewhat distorted because we don’t see them in practice.  I have had the first hand experience of this and I was struggling because inside I was torn to following whether what I was taught by the education school or the school culture that I am in.  It shouldn’t be so hard for a teacher like me to stand up for myself and tell the other teachers that we shouldn’t be treating the students like a bunch of juvenile but it is.  The concern of being called idealistic and being misinterpreted to be somebody trying to make an impression are also common experiences of my classmates when they are doing their practicum.  In their practicum, they are thrown to observe different public schools and work with other teachers.  Unfortunately, most teachers they have worked with are so filled with a cynical perception of the students.  Some common labels these teachers attach to the students are lazy, pasaway or stubborn, problem student or problem section, poor student or poor section among others.  This is where agreement #1 comes in as an essential standpoint in classroom management and school culture.  Thoughts are magnets, which attract most what it thinks of mostly.  Words usually represent thoughts.  Words are thoughts in action.  When you say it, you’ve said it.  You’ve enacted it.  But when at the process of thinking and you filter your thoughts, and in this same process you change your words, you strengthen that ability of yours to make good judgment; you practice discernment.   Much more, you don’t enact bad thoughts and you teach yourself to look in a different perspective.  When a teacher sees his students and forms his thoughts about them, his thoughts attract the very object he’s thinking about.  So if you think “lazy”, you attract “lazy”.  If you think pasaway (stubborn), you attract pasaway.  But when you think “good student”, you attract “good student.”  When you think “improving student”, you attract “improving student.”  But the tricky part about this agreement is this – sincerity, the genuine reflection of your thoughts and actions.  The most important part in agreement #1 is your paradigm shift.  We are not talking about flattering and praising our students.  We are talking about our sincere perception of them that says they are important and capable of growth.  We are talking about viewing them and looking at them through a different lens.  We are impeccable with our words because our thoughts have become clearer.  We have unconditionally accepted and loved our students, thus, we see them in a different light.  (To be continued.)

The 4 Agreements in Classroom and Life (Part 1 of 5)

The Four Agreements

I couldn’t remember exactly when I first heard about the 4 agreements.  All I remember was how a speaker in a seminar stressed his point about how simple life can be if we stick to these agreements.  The seminar was about health and wellness.  It was well attended by different scholars here and abroad.  As the speaker explained how each agreement could be applied and how each agreement could ultimately bring a long-lasting effect to our relationship with everyone.  I couldn’t help but agree. 

During our training, I also learned that these 4 agreements play a vital force in MI culture and practices. The four agreements are:

1. Be impeccable with your word.

2. Do not take things personally.

3. Do not make assumptions.

4. Always do your best.

Let’s discuss the four agreements briefly.  The broad concept of agreement #1 is to avoid sinning with our thoughts.  Since words are thoughts in action, words most naturally reflect our thoughts.  Words are powerful tools and as powerful as they are, its users should be keen and responsible. In the movie Spiderman, Peter was told,  “With great power comes great responsibility.”   Our words can either build or destroy and its our choice how to use them.  In a nutshell, integrity, encouragement, and word of honor are some of the traits that exhibit this agreement.  Agreement #2 lets you open your frame of reference to the point of view of others.  Not taking things personally mean that when others seem to have formed their perception about things, situations, people, including you, it’s about them, not about you.  They see things from their lens.  This also enables us to deepen our understanding of others.  It reinforces one of the 7 habits of highly effective people – seek first to understand, then to be understood.  Agreement #2 simply means as it’s written – do not make assumptions.  How many conflicts have we witnessed in the workplace simply because another party or one makes an assumption.  How many arguments are caused simply by “I thought-attitudes” and end up in “I thought-phrases”?  Agreement #4 sums up the 4 agreements.  Simply put, if you’re doing something ask yourself this, “Did you put all of your self into it? – Your mind, your heart, your soul?” According to the Mayans, these four agreements are the “sit of wisdom and happiness”; just four rules, no complications and I am delighted as to how these agreements are integrated to classroom discipline and management.

MI Lens: On Discipline thru Positive Communication: Ripple Effect

  “You guys are so lazy.”  “You’re always dilly-dallying that’s why you’re not accomplishing anything.”  At the risk of sounding negative even though I’m writing about the power of positive paradigm in communication and discipline, I took the courage of quoting some of the teachers I’ve worked with in other schools to cite a common example of how paradigms can be negative and destructive.  However, I regret that despite I knew that we shouldn’t brand students negatively; I wasn’t able to call their attention to their actions and its repercussions.  Whenever I hear them give such a sermon, my mind just automatically flashes back to my own experience.

In elementary, I was sent out of my classroom for not being able to do my assignment in Mathematics.  My math teacher threateningly asked me, “Where is your assignment?” and I sadly replied, “I didn’t do it teacher…” He asked why and I said, “My mom’s lola died.  We were busy and…” Before I was even able to finish my sentence, I already heard him shouting at me, “Get out!  I don’t need you in my class!  Get out!”  I wasn’t able to stand up right away because I wanted to finish telling him why I wasn’t able to do my assignment with the hope that maybe he’d show some mercy.  But no, he didn’t give me a chance.  I silently walked out of the room and went to the library. 

As I’m currently pursuing a career in teaching, I am forced to reflect with my previous experiences as a student when I was a child so that I may avoid negative paradigms and practices my teachers have exhibited in the classroom.  It is in our training today that I get to reflect on my past experiences as a child student.  I was also able to appreciate the power of disciplining thru sending positive messages in a deeper perspective as we role-play in a practical positive communication skills exercises.  Two words - positive communication – that’s what mostly instilling discipline is all about.  With this new lens that I’m wearing, I’m starting to see and hear things differently.  I’m starting to study the effect of every word I say and I question whether the message I’m sending promotes positivity and is directed to eliciting an appropriate attitude.  I have then realized the power of words that we utter not only to its receiver but for its sender as well.  Looking back at my experience in math class, I wonder how, if I were my math teacher, would I have been able to handle it without humiliating, omitting, and sending a student out.  I tried wearing the non-judgmental and positive hat and this is what I’ve come up with: I would’ve asked my student politely why he didn’t have an assignment and maybe I would’ve found out that the student’s mom’s grandmother had just died and his family attended the funeral and went to the interment.  I would’ve realized that members of the student’s family could’ve been busy that time that was why they weren’t able to assist the child in his assignment.   As his teacher, I would have probably said, “I’m sorry for your loss.  How are you and your mom? It must be hard for her.  Now, I’m sure that you want to catch up with the lesson.  I promise I’ll help you out later.”   I could’ve even called his family and express my condolences and talk about how well their little boy solved some extra problems I gave.  With that, I would’ve sent the right message to the boy and build bridges with the family.  I would’ve felt better about myself for being a good teacher and choosing to respond positively.  Yes, that’s how I wished my math teacher had viewed the circumstances.  (In my to do list, I'll write him a letter about it.  Of course, it's been ages but I'm a little curious about what his response would be.)

 As teachers, we have the responsibility to stay positive at all times no matter how hard the practice may be.  Our choice of words, and choice of actions are what the students live with everyday.   They don’t just hear or see these choices we make; they also experience them; and most importantly, it stays with them.  That’s why if as teachers, we strive to see the best in our students, our students may also choose to see the best in others so that these others may eventually make small drops of  buoyancy that create such ripple effect.

Now, as I aspire to be a part of the community that celebrates making a difference as one of its pillars, I agree that it’ll only be possible to make a difference if I know that “Negativity is not an option.” – or much better put, “Positivity is the only choice.”  The glass is half-full. J

 

 

 

First Day High: MI Lens: A Fresh Journey, A Fresh Perspective

I have had the privilege of listening to Ms. Joy Abaquin, the founding directress of Multiple-Intelligence International School during our first day of Faculty Training today Monday, May 2. I just have to say that the ambiance in MI campus is quite different from most campuses that I’ve visited. First thing I admired was how polite the guard and the crew were to absolutely everybody; second, the kind staff inside the administration office who were so eager to attend to absolutely anybody who enters it; third, the enthusiasm of Ms. Joy to share this fresh concept; and last but not the least, the rest of the faculty and staff-to-be who are now all starting their journey with MI and are ready to make a difference in this profession.

Today’s journey began with some icebreakers that really broke the ice amongst the new members of the team. It was always so much fun to see how people of different backgrounds and personalities unite to change their perspective not just in teaching but also in their personal lives to eventually positively affect the lives of students. I think one of the most exciting parts of the journey of being with MI is they don’t just teach the theories they teach you in education school, they actually practice them. And when I say practice them – they really do. They are true to the core essence of what education is and should be about. Gone were the days when children were branded as low IQ or high IQ merely based on their test-taking survival. Present though, is MI’s belief that each individual has different gifts and that a child is not merely his or her IQ. Each child has his or her own strength and MI acknowledges that without making them feel a less better person just because they are weak on other aspects of their studies. Moreover, they sincerely and truly help students improve their performance with a concrete, step-by-step, procedure they share to each teacher so that each faculty member may be better equipped with skills to handle challenging situations the MI way. This is only my first day of training and I can’t wait to learn more about the culture of MI.

While I was at a crossroad of choosing a school where I want to work in, often, I would ask myself during my visits to these schools whether I would enroll my child, or let’s say my niece or nephew to such academe. I answered yes to MI. And I hope that more students and parents hear about this school. If it’s a cliché to say that the youth is the hope of tomorrow, MI doesn’t think so. If I can sum it up, I would say that MI students are a part of such hope for a better tomorrow – hope that we have so desperately want to believe to exist. And here in one corner of the Philippines exists a learning environment that I am very proud to be a part of. After today’s training, I can only envision this - that we, MI teachers do the best we can to make that hope sparkle even more. In a popular story that Ms. Abaquin shared us, there are only three kinds of brick layers – a brick layer who knows he lays brick; a brick layer who sees as far as building walls; and a brick layer who believes he’s building a cathedral. In New Era University, while I was taking up Education Units, I was reminded by one of my professors (Dr. Ledesma, thank you!) that teachers are nation builders. I realize now how importance it is to be a teacher with this kind of perspective before embarking on a new journey. Now I’m starting to see thru MI lens. If it were a pair of eyeglasses, I’ll lend it to you. You should try it. It’ll take some adjustment but once you’re adjusted to it, you’ll probably see the world a much better place and your students, much better persons. That’s what I intend to do. I’m wearing the lens starting today.